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  • Why Do I Feel Like I’m in a Rut?

    Many of us have been struggling through the pandemic to establish a “new normal.” If you find that it’s been months since you worked out, ate right, or had your usual energy, you are not alone.

    Or maybe you did adapt (temporarily), but now you are struggling with accomplishing even the smallest tasks. If you are constantly about the infinite possibilities you missed in the past year and a half…that’s the rut dragging you down. This may start as a few days or even a few months of low mood, self-deprecating thoughts, self-medicating, or avoidance of well…everything.

    If you’re reading this, it’s probably a sign that you’re pretty tired of feeling sh*tty.

    So what does this mean, am I forever stuck in this rut?

    Absolutely not.

    Your life stressors are just signs that it is time to pivot and look honestly at how you can get out of your own way. Rest assured that every season has a reason, and this one will pass just like the others.

    What will I get out of therapy?

    Therapy with me will give you a chance to look inquisitively at your inner self, your problems, and the solutions that are available to you. Of course, there’s no formula or a one-size-fits-all, but there are some general tips/questions you can begin to ask yourself when figuring out your way out of the rut.

    1. Allow yourself to feel the not-so-great feelings. Sometimes we just need a day or two or more to let ourselves process. Use this time to get your feelings out on paper. Imagine yourself freeing up that mental hard drive for the things that will serve you in the future. I often give clients prompts to help them figure out what is holding them back.

    2. Set a bounce-back-to-me date on your calendar. The mind likes to know what is coming in the near future, so set a date for when you will start really working on getting yourself out of the rut.

    3. Grounding. Grounding has countless benefits for the body and mind. Find a beach, a backyard, or a park and place your feet on the ground for 10-15 minutes. Your body’s nervous system will naturally enter a parasympathetic (relaxed) state. The change of scenery can help you to feel unstuck.

    4. Work on an action plan. A lot of the time, we may feel like we aren’t doing well enough (by our own standards), or feeling down–but can’t quite pinpoint what it is that’s holding us back. One thing we can do in therapy is work on an action plan to help you figure out SPECIFICS of what you may need to do in order to become a better version of yourself. Is it your job that’s contributing to these feelings? Or something needs to change in your relationships? What can you control in the near future?

    Let’s start now and work on getting you out of a rut: [email protected] or text/call: 917.524.7663


    Yana Kofman, LMHC